Fun Questions

I get weekly emails from BabyCenter telling things to expect from childhood development. The message for my five-year-old (link to article) reminded me of something I observed while registering David for school a couple of months ago...

While waiting in a slow-moving line, I tried to entertain the children. We sat at a table in the elementary school cafeteria (where the line was) and did Daddy-children things like make silly faces and tickle each other.

Then I noticed we were being watched.

It's not unusual for people, particularly little people (meaning children), to stare at me and the children when we play. I like to think it's because we have such great fun (it could be because of my misshapen head, though...). I overheard the conversation of siblings that provided another reason for the stares.

We were sitting near a family where the mother was working on the seemingly-endless forms. [How shall I put this?] The family was apparently Vietnamese (at least that's what the language sounded like, and the registration forms provided alternate instructions in Spanish and Vietnamese only, so I just figured...). In addition to the mother were two children: a second-grader sister, and a kindergartner brother.

The brother and sister were staring at us playing for a while, when the younger brother started quietly asking his sister questions—never taking his eyes off of us. The sister tried to answer him as best she could in their native language, but seemed to not satisfy him.

The back-and-forth continued a little while more, with the sister turning to face the brother, speaking slower and more staccato-like, emphasizing each word. (Remember that we didn't know what they were discussing, because this was all in increasingly heated Vietnamese.)

Finally, at her wits' end, the sister slowly explained in English: "Their skin is white because their mommy's skin is white."

[One more question from the brother.]

The sister elaborated, "If our mommy had white skin, your skin would be white, too! That's just how they are."


How should parents address the race questions that ultimately come?

We teach that we all are children of God, and opportunities like this one provide additional teaching opportunities—both about skin pigment and the universality of the atonement, despite history's unfortunate prejudices (see 2 Ne 26:33).

I wonder how I'm doing as a parent. I haven't had many opportunities to discuss race or other differences (besides modesty and Word of Wisdom items). Given the unconventional racial distribution of students at his school, I imagine David may have some questions for me some time (see figure, below; link).


We'll take life as it comes, showing love to our children and their friends, and answering as best we can the fun questions that childhood brings.

Until We Meet Again

This entry is part of my general conference application series.

Until We Meet Again, by President Thomas S. Monson

I urge you to study the messages [of conference] and to ponder their teachings and then to apply them in your life.

These words of President Monson came as personal validation for this, my general conference application series. I remember two conferences ago feeling quite strongly that I needed to do this as a way of internalizing the messages and being reminded of their messages. Too often in the past I've finished conference with a mighty sigh and said, "Wow! What a great conference!", only to give little thought afterward and apply almost nothing that I heard.

I've liked seeing the application of the principles discussed in my life. I hope I'm a better person because of it.

In this address—the last one of this conference—President Monson caught my attention:

Now, a word of caution to all—both young and old, both male and female. We live at a time when the adversary is using every means possible to ensnare us in his web of deceit, trying desperately to take us down with him. There are many pathways along which he entices us to go—pathways that can lead to our destruction. Advances in many areas that can be used for good can also be used to speed us along those heinous pathways.

When the prophet of God issues warnings, I want to pay attention! He continued to discuss the dangers of the Internet and the prevalance of pornography and society's increasing apathy regarding moral virtues. I well remember the loving-yet-stern voice of power when President Monson said:

if you have allowed yourself to become involved in this behavior, cease now. Seek the help you need to overcome and to change the direction of your life. Take the steps necessary to get back on the strait and narrow, and then stay there. (emphasis added)

On my commute yesterday, I listened to Sister Dalton's recent CES Fireside address (link). Just before speaking of a need for us to lead out in a return to virtue through moral reform, she made a comparison that I found incredibly interesting. She spoke of the great environmental awareness that many of us have, calling us an "organic generation." We are concerned about air and water quality—we even have governmental agencies to mandate regulations for such—but many of us use insufficient filters on what we take into our minds through media, etc., "polluting [our] moral fiber."

This is reminiscent of Elder Oaks' now thirty-year-old quote on pornography (link):

We are surrounded by [immorality] . . . Pornographic or erotic stories and pictures are worse than filthy or polluted food. The body has defenses to rid itself of unwholesome food, but the brain won’t vomit back filth. Once recorded it will always remain subject to recall, flashing its perverted images across your mind, and drawing you away from the wholesome things in life.

I don't want to be drawn away. I don't want to be filled with pollution.

I want to be filled with light.

In the section called the "olive leaf," we are taught beautifully:

And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things.

Therefore, sanctify yourselves that your minds become single to God, and the days will come that you shall see him; for he will unveil his face unto you, and it shall be in his own time, and in his own way, and according to his own will. (D&C 88:67-68)

Incredible promises.

I'm grateful for the guidance afforded by prophets of God. The way to Christ is made clear as we listen, ponder, and apply their words.

I can't wait for another conference next weekend!

Bring Souls unto Me

This entry is part of my general conference application series.

Bring Souls unto Me, by Elder L. Tom Perry
Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles


I give an a capella concert each night to an audience of one. As I tuck in my children individually, they ask me to sing them songs. It's fun to see how their songs of choice change over time. Rebecca has been loving "I Love to See the Temple" for some time, but David has more recently started asking for "A Happy Family" and "Listen, Listen."

Elder Perry's talk reminded me of David's second song choice and his personal application. The song lyrics are:

Listen to the still small voice! Listen! Listen!
when you have to make a choice.
He will guide you always.

As we arrived home after walking from school recently, David suddenly looked at me with a spark in his eye and commanded, "Wait here; I know what to do!" Seeing no harm, and being very curious, I obeyed. He ran inside and emerged a few seconds later carrying a church pamphlet which briefly outlines our basic beliefs (similar to this: link).

With a shining, big smile, he announced that he needed to give the pamphlet to his friend, our neighbor. After he raced to her door and delivered his gift, he returned with a calm, satisfied look on his face.

I think he had listened to the "still small voice:" the Spirit.

Elder Perry observed:

Missionaries will continue to do the best they can, but wouldn't it be better if you and I stepped up to do a job that is rightfully ours and for which we are better suited since we know personally those who are lost and need to be rescued?

Just last night David showed me how well-suited he is for this charge when he returned to his friend's home and invited the family to attend his Primary sacrament meeting program this Sunday.

Every Sunday David wears a little badge on his vest that reads, "Future Missionary." Apparently, this isn't just a fashion statement, but is a way of life for him.

I'm grateful for the pure example of love shown by my son. I'm reminded of Isaiah's prophecy of millennial behavior; after speaking of lions and lambs, we read, "and a little child shall lead them" (Isa. 11:6).

Listen to the still small voice! Listen! Listen!
when you have to make a choice.
He will guide you always.

His Servants, the Prophets

This entry is part of my general conference application series.

His Servants, the Prophets, by Elder F. Michael Watson
Of the Seventy


I remember watching general conference and seeing Elder Watson's name on the screen and wondering, Who is this man, again? I knew that I recognized his name, but couldn't quite place it. After a quick online search, I learned that he had served as secretary to the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles for almost as long as I've been alive. Learning this confirmed his name in my memory because I received a letter from him while I was serving a mission (a great story for later...).

Learning of his extensive service with general authorities added additional understanding of and appreciation for his words. He spoke of knowing many presidents of the church—now I knew how.

What would it be like to be personally acquainted with prophets and apostles? Wonderful and humbling, I imagine. Here are points that impressed me from his summaries of serving with seven church presidents since 1970:

1. President Joseph Fielding Smith — Hearing of President Smith's frequent use of the question posed in Psalms 24 reminded me of my father-in-law singing those verses each Sunday morning we were together. He reminds me to have "clean hands, and a pure heart."
   
   
2. President Harold B. Lee — Considerably applicable to my life is the charge to listen to and heed the words of the prophets, even if: "It may contradict your political views . . . [or] your social views. It may interfere with some of your social life." But the promise remains that the Lord will bless us significantly.
   
   
3. President Spencer W. Kimball — "There is a miracle of forgiveness and God will forgive." Each day I'm increasingly aware of my need for forgiveness and help to improve.
   
   
4. President Ezra Taft Benson — I had missionary companions who must have prayed as did President Benson: "His prayers were almost entirely in thankfulness instead of asking for blessings." I think that such focus on what we receive can help us to remember the source of our blessings, which will help us keep our baptismal covenants to "Always remember Him."
   
   
5. President Howard W. Hunter — Our family has been striving to do as he taught: "Establish the temple of the Lord as the great symbol of [your] membership."
   
   
6. President Gordon B. Hinckley — Temples. "President Hinckley’s passion with the building of temples and the sacred work performed therein will be a polar star for each of us to follow."
   
   
7. President Thomas S. Monson — He is the kind of friend I want to be: "He has truly exemplified in his life the pattern of the Master and the sincere desire to always be found in His service."

I'm reminded of the song from the Children's Songbook:

Now we have a world where people are confused
If you don't believe it, go and watch the news.
We can get direction all along our way,
If we heed the prophets—follow what they say.

Follow the prophet... don't go astray.
Follow the prophet... he knows the way.
(Follow the Prophet, #110)

Gifts to Help Us Navigate Our Life

This entry is part of my general conference application series.

Gifts to Help Us Navigate Our Life, by Elder José A. Teixeira
Of the Seventy


This week's news seems full of accounts of and reactions to people who have chosen to exercise their respective freedom of speech. From politics to entertainment to sports, we hear of either support or condemnation to outbursts.

As with the exercise of other freedoms, freedom of speech (listed as a human right by ICCPR) does not include impunity. Consider the following from the entry on agency (link):

People are free to choose and act but are not free to choose the consequences of their actions. The consequences may not be immediate, but they will always follow.

As I see the many news headlines, I'm reminded of Elder Teixeira's words on the gifts and responsibilities we all have:

Our choices have the undeniable power of transforming our lives. This gift is an extraordinary sign of trust in us and simultaneously a cherished personal responsibility to use wisely. Our Father in Heaven respects our freedom to choose and will never force us to do what is right, nor will He impede us from making mediocre choices. ...

Choices have consequences attached, which may or may not be manifested immediately after our decisions. Using the spiritual gifts we have been given is paramount in order to remain on the right course.

Choices are powerful. Elder Teixeira later quoted President Monson: "Our lives will depend upon the decisions which we make—for decisions determine destiny."

The desire that we have to "remain on the right course" was well-illustrated with a comparison to a modern global positioning system (GPS) device. Such a system can aid travelers on life's roads know where they are, where they're going, the best way to arrive at their destination, and when they may arrive.

At last! An answer to childhood's favorite traveling question: "Are we there yet?"

Elder Teixeira brought the GPS illustration back to topic:

We too have within us a "GPS" allowing us to know at all times what is right and what is wrong, as well as assisting us in making correct choices.

As a technology-, science-, and geography-lover, I connected well with the internal GPS analogy. The Light of Christ (conscience) and the Gift of the Holy Ghost, of course, are what can provide our guidance as we traverse life's journeys.

Earlier I mentioned consequences. Despite any associated connotations, consequences aren't necessary bad. I'm reminded of the effects of consequences associated with the older—and more advanced!—GPS that Lehi and his family used on their journeys (see 1 Ne. 16). In speaking of this to his son many years later, the prophet Nephi explained (see 3 Ne. 37:38-46):

For just as surely as this director did bring our fathers, by following its course, to the promised land, shall the words of Christ, if we follow their course, carry us beyond this vale of sorrow into a far better land of promise. (v. 45)

The words of the prophets—the words of the Lord (see D&C 1:38)—are filled with wonderful consequences. We see the fulfillment—both good and bad!—of consequences in each scripture story.

I want to live so that I can use "spiritual gifts [I] have been given ... in order to remain on the right course." If I can do this, I know the consequence will be wonderful.

And, if you keep my commandments and endure to the end you shall have eternal life, which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God. (D&C 14:7)